Pregnancy FAQ's

Pregnant women are notorious for being crazy and getting offended if you say the wrong thing or ask the wrong question. While I'm sure Husband would attest to me being crazy, I like to pride myself in the fact that most questions/statements don't bother me. Feel free to tell me that I look like I'm going to pop (most likely I will agree with you!) Feel free to ask, "Are you sure there aren't 2 in there?" and I'll laugh too. I'm just so grateful to be pregnant that I don't see the point in getting all worked up just because people say something dumb about the fact that I'm fat. There are, however, a couple of the usual generic questions that EVERYONE asks that have complicated answers for us.

Question 1 - When are you due?
This is the easier of the tricky questions. March 6th is the real answer. But February 11th is when this baby will finally join our family (just scheduled the c-section today!) Which means the usual follow-up question asking how far along I am is also tricky to answer. Technically I'm 31 weeks. But I only have 5 more weeks to go. So why is the little guy coming so early? Here's the detailed answer: when we did fetal surgery to remove Lydia's tumor, the docs had to make not only a vertical incision, but an extra long vertical incision in order to perform the surgery. (C-sections today are done with horizontal, smaller incisions.) Most women who have c-sections are able to go full-term and opt for a non-c-section delivery in subsequent pregnancies (also known as v-bac. For the sake of my dad I'll avoid explaining what v-bac stands for. You're welcome Pops.) Due to the type and length of the incision I had during the fetal surgery (fetal surgery is different than a c-section, just in case you were wondering), my uterus has a much higher risk of splitting at the incision site if I go into labor. I don't know about you, but I definitely do not want my insides to explode open. So to avoid going into labor all together, the docs have determined it is best for me to deliver BEFORE I hit 37 weeks (the official "full term" mark). So after that super long explanation, you can see why it's hard to tell an innocent questioner in the grocery store my due date. I usually just respond with "the 2nd week of February" but then the follow-up question of "so how far along does that make you?" just doesn't add up. It's a lose-lose situation.

Question 2 - Is this your first?
"No. I have a daughter. She would be 2 but she passed away after she was born." Not only does answering briefly and truthfully make the questioner feel bad, it tugs at my heart strings too. I get that its a completely innocent question and I'm not offended when people ask, but the answer is hard no matter how I say it. If it's a stranger in the grocery store I usually just lie and say that it is my 1st. But then I think of my daughter and everything I went through to bring her here and I feel like I'm dishonoring both her memory as well as the crazy pregnancy we had. I've tried simply saying, "No, this is our 2nd" but 99% of the time a follow-up question is asked wondering how old the first is. Again, do I just lie and say she's 2 and carry on with my shopping while trying not to cry? I get that I'll be asked my whole life how many children I have, and Lydia will ALWAYS be included in that number, but I think the fact that we don't have any other kids just makes that answer harder. Here's to hoping that after more kids come the answer to this question will be less painful and less complicated.

Needless to say - we are beyond excited for Lydia's little bro to make his debut (he is still nameless - we're having a hard time narrowing our list down).

And because pictures make life happy - here is a picture of Husband's birthday trifle (because he is too good for birthday cake). Yes, it was delish!!